Shouzer

I tend to stay up late with the TV on, but much of the time I’m actually on the computer and not paying attention to it.  That means after something finishes playing, the TiVo will change to some random channel.  It’ll usually take a while, but eventually I realize somebody’s trying to sell me some sex pill (ExtenZe), some porn (Girls Gone Wild), or some get rich quick scheme.

After watching this shit in the background, I’ve decided I should write up some book with a bunch of weak “how to make money fast” ideas, and sell it to a bunch of bums with an infomercial.  I mean, come on, who falls for this stuff?  I saw one recently for something called “Jeff’s Shortcuts” and how it could make me a millionaire.  Seriously, you know Jeff is the only one making money here…

And I don’t really have a problem with that.  Good for him, I guess.  I’m just saying I need to get in on it.

For about a year starting last summer, I was a Blockbuster Total Access subscriber.  However, when I heard that the 360 was going to be integrating support for streaming Netflix movies, I decided it was time to jump ship.  I haven’t once regretted the decision.  It’s cheaper, the selection is better, and now I can stream movies through my 360, my TiVo, or any of my PCs, often at HD quality.  Testing

The only thing that Blockbuster had going for it (at all) was the fact that you could exchange your videos in-store for free.  It started out great, but then of course those greedy fuckers decided to start limiting it to 5 times a month.  Anyway, go Netflix. 

The subject says it all.  Play Auditorium.  It’s just a demo, but it’s totally worth the 30 minutes you’ll sink into it.  Do it.  Do it.

It’s weird here.  In the summer it doesn’t start getting dark until sometime around 9pm.  But now it starts getting dark around 4pm.  Now, certainly I understand that the days are shorter in winter and that daylight savings plays a role, but still…  I don’t ever remember living somewhere else that hard such a huge range in its days’ lengths.

You’d think it would be fairly obvious when it’s the only major sport without a playoff that something is wrong.  Clue #1.  Every single year there seems to be at least some controversy about who should be playing in the national championship.  Clue #2.  Damn near everybody and their mother–including the next President–thinks there should be a playoff system put in place.  Now of course being president doesn’t make you a sports expert, but still…  Clue #3.

Honestly, the argument that a lack of a playoff makes the regular season more exciting is fuckin’ stupid.  Are you telling me that it somehow made Texas/Oklahoma or Texas/Texas Tech better games?  Of course not.  In fact, they were such good games, I’d love to see rematches in the playoffs…  I really can see the argument.  If you lose one game, you’re liable to not be the national champion, even if it was a fluke.  That makes sense, but more often than not that’s not how it plays out.  This year is a perfect example of that.

Beyond that, though, the ranking system is pretty ridiculous, too.  How is Oklahoma above Texas now?  Because Oklahoma blew out a team that beat Texas?  Who really gives a shit?  Texas beat Oklahoma, and at a neutral location, no less.  Honestly, it’s not that impressive that Oklahoma beat Texas Tech at home.  Every team in the country has an advantage at home.  The only team of the three that had an impressive win in that sense was Texas.

Honestly I’m all for Texas not playing in a national championship–they won it all a few years ago, so I’m happy for somebody else to have a chance.  But frankly, they deserve it more than Oklahoma this year.  They beat them, and they didn’t have to play at home to do it.

You know you’ve missed these……

Last weekend, I went camping again with the outdoors meetup group. We went down to Hocking Hills Ohio to do a zip line tour and some hiking, and we stayed in a pretty sweet cabin. Once again, I didn’t know any of the 5 girls or 1 guy that were going. (Nice ratio btw).

The trip started out really well. I carpooled down to Ohio after work on Friday with two girls, and we had a pleasant conversation as well as a nice dinner at Chipotle. As a side note, I am loving the prevalence of higher class fast food places like Chipotle, Panera, Noodles and co., Zoup, etc. that they have around here. Those places dominate McDonalds in every way imaginable for like $2 more.

Saturday morning, the goodness continued. We went out to the zip line tour, which was sweet. It was basically just a series of zip lines through the trees. Zip lines are fun. We chatted as a group on the platforms between the zip lines, met a fun-loving couple who was also doing the zip lining that day, and I hit on the tour guide a little bit. Overall, a really nice morning.

But then, something bad happened. The other guy on the trip left. He had tickets to a show in Detroit and had to head home. I think it’s fair to say that anyone who knows me or reads this blog even a little bit knows that I did not handle this situation well. I kinda turned into the shy, quiet guy. I just didn’t know what to say for pretty much the rest of the trip.

A few of the girls joked that I was living the dream. I think that dream involves pajamas, pillow fights, a steamy trip to the hot tub, or some practice kissing. Instead, I got a conversation about menopause. I took that opportunity to take a long trip to the bathroom. Ladies, just for your reference, talking about woman’s issues is your version of sexual harassment. We just don’t want to hear that.

Honestly, I’ve played it up a little bit for comedic value. It wasn’t really that bad. I was pretty shy and quiet, but I didn’t feel that uncomfortable most of the time. We had a few really nice hikes, and I cooked a chicken pot pie for dinner on Saturday that was word-taking. It was so good that the chatter of 5 women was silenced for a few minutes while they savored the goodness. It wasn’t as fun as my first camping trip with this group, but I had a pretty good time.

Anybody who’s read Shouzer with even the slightest consistency certainly knows that I have very liberal political views.  It should come as no surprise, then, that I was ecstatic when MSNBC (gotta support MS, right?) announced Barack Obama would be our next president.  On a large scale, it showed me the amazing level of growth our country has seen in the last 50 years–much less the last 200.  Looking to the future, I felt the election signaled a very much needed change in direction for our country.

What really sucks, though, is that I’m not sure how much any president could do right now.  Obama will likely be taking office with the worst economy since FDR, and our world image has probably not ever been worse than it is now.  The fact that Bush will be leaving the presidency with the lowest approval ratings since those numbers have been recorded (lower even than Nixon’s when he resigned) only exemplifies the mess Obama will be taking over.

I guess my worry is that Obama’s presidency won’t live up to its potential, simply because he’ll spend his time cleaning up that mess.  Here’s to hoping that won’t be the case.  Personally, I would be happy even if Obama only got us back to where we were eight years ago–no wars, a budget surplus, and the respect of the world.  I don’t need national healthcare and a lot of that stuff (though it would certainly be nice).  I just want the country fixed.

So, without going into details, my car battery was dead after I got back from running PuzzleCrack this year.  I took it out, got it charged, and put it back in.  Everything worked fine (some of my car’s settings were reset, but that’s to be expected), except for my power windows.

For some reason, I could control the driver window and both back windows from the driver’s side, but not the front passenger side window.  Similarly, the controls for my front windows both have two steps when you push them.  Pushing them to the second step causes teh windows to keep going until they’re all the way open/closed.  That wasn’t working either.

It’s obviously not a huge deal or anything, I’ve got a full warranty on my car for 100,000 miles, so I decided I’d just take it in and get it fixed.  I got to the dealership, explained the issue, and the guy told me to follow him out to my car.  He turns it on, rolls the driver window down all the way and holds the button for a few seconds, then rolls it back up and holds it again.  He then did the same with the passenger side.  Somehow that fixed it.

I’m not really complaining, but wtf is that?  I guess it’s a good thing to know for the future, but really…should you even have to do that?

I took great satisfaction in watching the bottom-feeding Rams destroy the vaunted Cowboys. It was like poetic justice to watch that team fall apart. Jerry Jones has collect a team full of “big personalities”, but personalities don’t win championships. That’s what I always say.

I actually didn’t start watching the game until the second quarter, which is a shame considering all the best stuff happened in the first. I was streaming in on my computer as I watched the Bills vs. Chargers on the TV. I meant to add super-fast internet as another modern convenience that was rocking my apartment in my last post, but it slipped my mind.

Anyway, I think the big key to the game was the 42 yd TD catch by Donnie Avery as well as his near miss on the much longer pass play later in the game. That deep threat kept the Cowboys defense from focusing on the run throughout the game, freeing Jackson to run over them for 160yds.

The success of the offense kept the defense off the field and fresh, as well as motivated. This allowed them to get consistent pressure on the QB and force some big turnovers.

It is hard to judge if the Rams are better or if the Cowboys have just imploded that much, but I would say it’s a combination of the two. The victory was impressive in my mind, but I’m not expecting a playoff run at this point. I’m not even hoping for a hiring of Haslett full time yet, as many writers are. I do have renewed hope in their abilities though, and I am starting to really enjoy the NFL again. I was starting to prefer *gasp* NCAA football, but loyalty is no longer wavering.

I think the Rams will be hard-pressed to beat the Patriots next week. The keys to that game are stopping the run and establishing some passing threat. Once again, if they can stop the run, they can force Cassle to make mistakes under pressure, and a credible passing threat will open things up for Jackson against a pretty good defense.

Realistically, the Patriots are just too good at this point, especially at home, but the game in 2 weeks versus the Cardinals is an obvious must-win for the Rams to have a snow ball’s chance at the playoffs.

it gives me great pleasure to announce that i am adopting the tampa bay rays as “my” major league baseball team, and i am endorsing them for the world series.

this selection comes naturally as the rays are a florida based expansion team, just like my nba team, the orlando magic, and my nfl team, the jacksonville jaguars.

from this point forward, when asked the question, “what’s your team?” in reference to the mlb, i will amend my answer of “anybody who beats the yankees” to “the tampa bay rays, and anybody who beats the yankees.”

There are certain things I have around my apartment that just make my life way better. I think I would have to start with the dishwasher. If this isn’t a dream appliance, I don’t know what is. Washing plates by hand is for suckers.

Next is my electric blanket. This guy is a must have for any cooler climate. I haven’t turned my heat on yet despite the fact that the temperature outside is dropping below freezing already, and the electric blanket is a big part of that. Watching TV is just so much better when I’m wrapped up in this thing. I have been sick this week, and I put one on my bed when I was feverish and freezing. It warmed my buns right up, and at 180W, I could run it all night for pennies. I couldn’t do that though because it just does too good of a job of heating me. I would roast in the bed if I left it on all night.

The electric space heater comes in right behind the electric blanket. The big problem with my heat being off is in the morning trying to get ready for work. Going from warm bed to 50 degree bathroom is not a pleasant trip at 6:45. Having that thing blowing hot air on me while I brush my teeth helps a lot. This morning was the first time I used it in there, and it got so hot during my shower, I started feeling woozy and tired. I had to crack the door and let some cool air in from the rest of the apartment while I got dressed so I wouldn’t pass out in the sauna I created. It does run a bit steep on the electricity at 1500W, but I only use it for 20 minutes a day. Plus, you can’t put a price tag on that kind of luxury.

Yeah, I was excited. I was following the game on ESPN play-by-play, and I have a P2P video going as well. The video was laggy and delayed, but it was better than nothing.

The thing that made me very happy about this win was that they did it with the defense. For years the defense has been a stone around the neck of the organization. Now, they are winning the game despite poor play from the offense.

They’ve got a long way to go, but if the defense can keep playing staunchly, the offense should come around as Bulger gets his confidence back. It’s nice to have some hope again. It would be nice if they could manage not to crush it.

Update: I was very happy to see 3 NFC East teams go down this week. One of the best things about the NFL is the parity, and it was discouraging to think that a division could so thoroughly dominate everyone else. Considering those 3 teams went down the Cardinals, the Rams, and the Browns, it shows any team can win any week.

I boycotted the NFL Sunday afternoon games. They gave me Detroit vs. Chicago and Dallas vs. Cincinnati. The first game was ridiculously boring, and the I’m tired of watching the Cowboys.

I watched season 1 of Chuck instead. That is a great show. It’s funny and action-packed. The main character, Chuck, has a goofy yet lovable charm. Adam Baldwin plays a NSA agent that is practically a carbon copy of his character on Firefly, and I loved that character. Of course, there is the ultra-hot CIA agent protecting Chuck as well. She’s more than just a pretty face too. I’m pretty impressed with her acting skills as well. She manages to convey her burning desire for Chuck with pure emotion. They have great chemistry.

Al came over to watch the Michigan vs. Illinois game at the Big House. It was cool going to a college game as it’s been a while since I’ve done that. There were 109k+ people there, which made it even more cool. Illinois destroyed Michigan. They just dominated them in every aspect of the game. The Michigan fans did not take it well. I was pretty disappointed with them. They were yelling at the refs over extremely obvious calls. It was just rude. I would expect someone who was completely decked out in football apparel to have some concept of the rules regarding pass interference. It would appear that I was wrong.

There was one really good moment in the Detroit vs. Chicago game, and I was fortunate enough to catch it live. What I love most about this is that Lovey Smith challenged this play despite getting the pass interference call. He was so confident in his team’s ability to beat the Lions that he could essentially throw away a challenge. The catch was sick, and it deserved to be recognized.

I am not your friend, nor do I want to be.  Quit calling the American people “your friends” everytime you address them.  Frankly, it’s presumptuous and insulting.

Say what you will about Trent Green replacing Marc Bulger. There have been some great quotes come out of this business.

First is from Bernie Miklasz at the St. Louis Post Dispatch:

Now it’s Trent Green’s turn to line up behind the pylons that form the Rams offensive line.
Best of luck to a proud, stout-hearted quarterback who has a history of concussions…
The downside?
The imminent threat to Green’s health and safety.
If you are so inclined, say a little prayer for the dude. Mrs. Green thanks you in advance.
Green is 38, his last two seasons have been ended by concussions, and he doesn’t have very good bodyguards.

And this one by MJD and Yahoo sports

What concerns me right now — and I know this is selfish of me — is that I don’t want to witness Trent Green’s death…
And this Sunday, he’ll step behind an offensive line that couldn’t protect a triple bacon cheeseburger from Calista Flockhart. I feel like the Rams are making a Faces of Death video.