What Not To Not Wear

kyle March 13, 2007 4 Comments

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If you find the weather getting warmer, and you happen to be a college boy desperate for some college girl pie, there are certain things you must clothe yourself in. First, find your wrinkled khaki shorts, the more wrinkled the better. Chicks dig these, and since they are the only kind of shorts you own, you are off to a good start. Next, the shirt. Try looking through your little sister’s closet. You are trying to find something bright, preferably pink, and way too small for you. If you are out of luck, get a shirt emblazoned with fraternity letters. It doesn’t matter if it’s your fraternity or even if it’s your shirt, just make sure it isn’t clean. Get yourself some flip-flops, because shoes are so faux pas in the spring time. Finally, if you’ve showered, shaved, or brushed your teeth in the last week, you might want to stay in a few more days. There’s nothing that turns a girl off more than fresh breath, a smooth face, and the sweet aroma of Axe.

Yeah, I saw some interesting characters on my way to class today. All of them looked like the above. I think I might be getting the flu.

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4 Responses to “What Not To Not Wear”

  1. jared said:

    Mar 13, 07 at 2:28 pm

    haha, that definitely sounds about right. honestly, the only shorts i have are khaki shorts, but they’re typically not wrinkled or dirty. the one area i certainly agree with you is about the pink shirt that’s way too small. it’s all too common.

  2. al said:

    Mar 13, 07 at 2:35 pm

    Bonus points for wearing plaid shorts with a popped pink polo.

  3. Jordan said:

    Mar 13, 07 at 6:04 pm

    It’s funny you decided to chime in, Albert, because I have a photo of you that I feel others need to see.

  4. jen said:

    Mar 13, 07 at 11:02 pm

    …when did al get a stretch armstrong neck?

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