Shouzer

So there’s definitely some things I’d like to get my hands on. First of all, I want an iPhone. The damn thing hasn’t been released, but you know Apple is planning that shit. It’d be pimp if they had some beta testing program I could be a part of. As a recent convert to the Mac cult, I believe I’d be a prime candidate. I could also start a propaganda machine or something. Resistance is futile.

Number two on the list is probably Halo 3. I’ve been thinking for a while that I could really go for some of that action. After all, who couldn’t? “Oh, me? I don’t like Halo. I think the Master Chief is a punk.” Nobody has ever said that to me, and until I hear it, I refuse to believe it. We played some 5v5 Halo 2 the other night, and that really only served to spark the flame. I was on fire most of the night. Anyway, the trailer they showed at e3 was amazing, and I can’t wait to get my hands on it. Bungie, if you’re reading (and, come on, we both know you are), I’d also be open to some sort of beta program here.

I think next would have to be for Studio 60 to not get cancelled. The show certainly hasn’t lived up to Sports Night or The West Wing yet, but I definitely think it’s got potential. Personally, I love Matthew Perry in that show, and I don’t think it’d be an overstatement to say that Jason has a mancrush on him. As for the comparisons to prior Sorkin shows, to be fair, The West Wing didn’t show many similarities to Sports Night until it had been on for a while either. If you’re not watching it, start. That’s really all there is to that.

Let’s see.. I also want Firefly to come back. That show was the best damn show there’s ever been, and it didn’t last more than a season. How weak is that? Very. The only conclusion I can really gather from that is people are just generally dumb. Seriously, there’s been like 83 seasons of Survivor, and Firefly can’t catch a break? That’s ridiculous.

I want Apple to release a true video iPod with a widescreen, touchscreen interface. That would be the sex, to quote Kyle. It’s been rumored for a while, a LONG while, but the only thing we’ve ever seen were fake mockups, and that’s just nowhere near as fun as the real thing. When I got my mp3 player (thanks again, Anita!), iPods really were a bit of a joke in terms of functionality to cost ratio. The only thing they had going for them was the “cool” factor, which again, is more or less a sign of the stupidity of people. But nowadays, they actually are up there with everything else.

I’d like for the new Bourne movie to go ahead and get released. I’ve had the second one on DVD for a while now, so it seems like they’d be on that shit pretty soon. I have no idea when, in reality. It could be 13 years out, but I hope not–my guess is that Matt Damon wouldn’t have the same badass aura then that he does now. I could be wrong.. He could be like William Shatner, a badass at age 75.

Next on my ongoing list is I’d like Microsoft to fix the brokeass functionality of the 360 when it comes to streaming media over the network. Right now you can stream music, and that works like a charm. It’s great, as a matter of fact. Great, I tell you. Kyle routinely streams music off my computer to his 360 (ahem, asshole). But how god damn hard is it to include a couple decent codecs (DivX anyone?) and let you stream videos from your pc? They wonder why people mod their Xboxen.. Well this is the reason. Get over yourselves and WMV. It blows.

Well, that looks like it’s about it for now. I might have to bust out a post like this every once in a blue moon.

[Edit:] OMFG! How could I forgot? The mother of all things I want! Check out the last item in this ad. Absolutely amazing? I know it is, and you know it is.  Who doesn’t want a nerf sniper rifle?